Fashion Maths: A/W 2016

Fashion Maths: A/W 2016

The fashion season in numbers, from boobs to bell rings...


Illustrator: Nathalie Lees; Writer: JJ Martin


Orchestral instruments playing on the giant scaffolding set at the Philipp Plein men’s show, while skateboarders and BMXers whizzed past as a warm-up for Lil Wayne’s live performance
Cars in the Frecciarossa 1000 train used as the backdrop for Damir Doma’s men’s show in Milan’s central station
Elastic bands handwoven into a single dress and eight kitty handbags worn as necklaces on the Loewe catwalk in Paris
Years that Dries Van Noten waited to secure the stage of the Paris Opera House for his show venue
Turban-wearing gospel singers at Stella Jean’s Milan show, who sang Coolio’s Gangsta’s Paradise followed by Amazing Grace
Looks introduced in an old-school couture style by a woman’s terse voice and no music at Hedi Slimane’s last show for Saint Laurent in Paris
Famous boobs unexpectedly making their catwalk debut at the Versace women’s show in Milan, thanks to Gigi Hadid’s malfunctioning dress
Cowbell ringers dressed in traditional Tyrolean costume stomping along the Moncler Gamme Rouge mountain-inspired catwalk in Paris
Guests at Kanye West’s Yeezy show at Madison Square Garden in New York, most of whom were Kanye fans who had paid $25 for a general admission ticket
Number of oversized arches creating a tunnel inside Dior’s mirrored cube set at the Louvre’s Cour Carrée in Paris
Pieces of sushi placed on a naked female model lying on a table set for eight at Umit Benan’s men’s show in Paris
Huge trucks spouting fire while transporting models and singer Chris Brown to Philipp Plein’s women’s show in milan
Models, multiplied by mirrors and choreographed by Blanca Li, in front of 17 optical light screens at Iris van Herpen’s Paris show
Minutes of silent performance by tattooed Ukrainian ballet dancer Sergei Polunin before the Ports 1961 show at Milan’s Palazzo Reale
Pink and silver sequinned princesses and one giant gold carriage at Dolce & Gabbana’s fairytale-themed women’s show in Milan
Guests brought by Chanel to Havana for the brand’s Resort collection, where 170 vintage cars transported them to the outdoor catwalk on Paseo del Prado
Mini video screens, five giant film screens and nine models filming themselves at Dolce & Gabbana’s Sicilian Spaghetti Western men’s show in Milan
Models marching in puffer coats and fur at Moncler Grenoble’s outdoor show at New York’s Lincoln Center on the coldest day of the year
Flags (one for each US state) hanging in the American Cathedral in Paris for the Vetements show, where guests sat in pews reading slogans such as ‘Are we having fun yet?’ and ‘You fuck’n asshole’
Screaming teens chanting the name of digital hottie Cameron Dallas in Milan at the Calvin Klein men’s show, where he was a guest
Variations of the classic captain’s jacket at the Tommy Hilfiger show in New York, where a giant cruise ship was constructed in the middle of the Park Avenue Armory
Pairs of Union Jack loafers at the Gucci Resort show at London’s Westminster Abbey
Front row seats at Chanel’s show inside Paris’ Grand Palais, which required eight minutes to navigate from start to finish
Giant crystal columns, covered in 200,000 pieces of shattered mirror, by artist Justin Morin at the Louis Vuitton show in Paris
Live musicians and models dancing to Stephen Galloway choreography at Edward Buchanan’s Milan show

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